A Mary heart in a Martha world

A Mary Heart in a Martha World - The tale of two sisters

Recently I taught a Sunday School lesson on Mary of Bethany and Martha, her sister. Its a compelling, convicting lesson for women because we are always trying to do it all, and want to share it with all who wish to hear.

First read:
Luke 10:38-42 John 11:1-44 John 12:1-11

Have you ever tried to do it all?

The story of conflict we feel as a woman. You have Martha, I picture Martha Stewart, Tidy house, china, all the cookbooks out, cooking every recipe in them, gorgeous fresh cut flowers all around in her starched dress and apron - after working 9 hours at her job, taking the kids everywhere from A-Z, Miss hostess. So little time.
Where is Mary? Her sister. As Martha is busy preparing and slaving away in the kitchen, men are gathered in the living room, and there is Mary. Literally, she is sitting at the feet of Jesus.

Life is often like this for us. God often puts people with such different personalities in the same family. Mary meanders around through life stopping to smell the roses, and Martha cuts the roses making beautiful arrangements with them.
Jesus knew Martha would never be Mary, nor Mary like Martha. They both faced having the same choice - work or worship. Regardless of our different spiritual gift or personality, its a choice we make. Personality wise it may become easier to Mary than Martha. Its easy to get caught up in the "do's" of the day.

Mary's heart:
Jesus probably stopped by unexpectedly. Mary standing by as all the men take off their back packs, bags and all. Such joy, Mary is drawn to Him. Speechless. Unable to move. She asks herself, Could Jesus be the Messiah people say He is? She knew he was a great teacher but, this- it could possibly be the Son of God! She creeps closer - listening. Mary knows there is plenty to do. But she can't move, except closer to Jesus.

Martha's mind:
So, in our lives an unexpected visitor stops by. What do you do? You've worked all day, havent gotten supper ready, laundry everywhere, toys, dirty dishes OH MY! Do I make tea, coffee, cookies??
Now, if it was King Jesus???

Everyday in our lives, work and worship collide. Legitimate needs surround us, compelling us to work. You hear God's tender call to come away, you respond "yes Lord" then the phone rings, you forgot to pick up milk, supper is burning. Suddenly, all of those good intentions disappear. We have constant tension between urgent and important. The problem is the important tasks rarely must be done today, or even this week. Extra hours of prayer or bible study will just have to wait. You simply cant find the time, the urgent tasks call for immediate action. Endless demands, pressure every hour, every day. Familiar?

Jesus is our supreme example. He is never in a hurry. He knew who he was and where he was going and wasnt held hostage by the worlds demands or even desperate needs. He told his disciples " I will only only do what The Father tells me to do."
Jesus invites us to share this intimacy. To know Him. To see Him so clearly that when we look upon Him, we see the face of God as well. Just as he welcomed Mary to sit at his feet in the living room- Just as He invited Martha to see the better part. Jesus bids us to come. In obiediance to His invitation we find the key to our lonings, the secret to living beyond the daily pressures that would otherwise tear us apart. As we learn what it means to choose the better part of intimacy with Christ, we begin to be changed.

Our Saviour, excepts us for who we are, Mary or Martha, or a combination of both. He loves us too much to leave us that way. He is THE ONE who can give us a Mary heart in a Martha world.
This transformation is exactly what we see in the continuing stories or Mary of Bethany and Martha. Martha doesnt lay aside her personality, hobbies, and burn her cookbooks to worship Jesus. She recieves Jesus' rebuke and learns there is time for work and worship. Martha in the later gospel is no longer frantic and resentful but full of faith and trust. Mary changes too, although a natural worshipper she is vunerable to despair, she finally realized Jesus' time is short, she steps forward and seizes the opprotunity to serve.

Busyness, by itself Breeds distraction.

Luke 10:38 shows a woman with the gift of hospitality. Martha opens her home to Jesus but, that doesnt mean she opens her heart. In her eagerness to serve Jesus, she almost missed the opprotunity to KNOW HIM.

Martha was distracted buy all the preperations that HAD to be done. Keyword: HAD
In Martha's mind nothing less than the very best would do she had to go all out for Jesus. We can get caught up in the same performance trap feeling as though we must prove our love for God, by doing great things for Him. So we rush through life to get busy implementing great ministries and wonderful projects all in effort to share the good news. We call Him "Lord, Lord" but will he know you?

The world applauds achievements - God desires compainionship.
The world says do more, be all you can be - God says "be still, and know that I am God"

He isnt looking for workers, He is looking for Sons and daughters. When we put our work before worship, we put the cart before the horse. The horse must come first or we end up pulling our own cart. Frustrated and weary, we can nearly break under pressure of service for there is always something to do.
Some step up the pace, volunteering for everything and you find yourself starring into the night - wondering if this is all there is. Or prehaps you have withdrawn from service yet that peace and quiet you hoped for holds no peace, no quiet. This stillness, hasnt lead to a closer walk with God - just a sense of resentment. Your empty. You go to church, go through the motions of worship and you leave the same as you did when you came in.

The message is: salvation isnt about what you do - Its about what Jesus did. The cross paid for more than my sins, it set me free. From the bondage of the "shoulds,if onlys, and what might have beens."

Jesus words to martha are the words he wants to speak to us. You are worried and upset about many thing, but only one thing is needed. The one thing is not found in doing more, its about sitting at His feet. The only requirement for friendship with God is showing up with an open heart- ready to recieve.
Jesus says in Matthew 11:28-29 - "come to me all you who are weary and burdened, I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gently and humble in heart. You will find rest for your souls."

Jesus invites us to come, rest spend time with him. Intimacy. Intimacy that allows us to hear our fathers voice and will. Intimacy that so fills us with His love and his nature that it spills out. We have to start just as Mary did. Right at the feet of Jesus.

3 Deadly D's:
Distraction, Discouragement, Doubt.
When Jesus met Martha she was distracted. Thats where Satan usually begins. He knows if we are so overly worried and bogged down by duties, chances are our heart will not hear our Saviors call. While distraction may not win the battle for our soul, getting our eyes off what is important will certainly make us more vunerable to attack.
KJV says that Martha was cumbered about much serving. Another way of saying distracted. Oxford dictionary deines the word cumber: To overwhelm, overthrow, destroy, to harass, distress,bother, or trouble.

When we are distracted , discouragement is usually around the corner. Weariness creeps in as life overpowers us and causes us to say and do things we usually would never do. Discouragement breaks down our perspective and our defenses. Though we may have just completed great things for God, weary discouragement tells us we are useless, hopeless and abandoned.

Self pity is a lonely occupation. Failure is almost iminent. Its easier to hide than face life head on. We easily become downhearted and downright depressed. Discouragement drains us of all hope and vison of our dreams.

5 strategy's to fight discouragement;
1-allow for rest stops - discouragement is our bodies way of saying "stop, I need rest!"
Exodus 34:21
2-Get a new point of view - take a few steps back ask God to help you see his perspective on your situation, often what we see as a mountain is a stepping stone to Him. (Isaiah 33:17)
3-Have patience. Its easy to get discouraged when things dont go the way we plan but when you have commited your concerns to the Lord, rest assured He is at work even when you can see His hand (Romans 8:28)
4-Mingle. discouragement feeds off isolation. Get out of the house! visit some friends good ole' fashion fellowship can lift your spirit and chase away the blues. (psalm 133:1)
5- Set the timer. Ok so things arent so good. set a timer for 10 minutes. Have a good cry when the buzzer sounds, blow your nose wipe your eyes- surrender the situation to God and MOVE ON! (Ecclesiastes 3:4)
What we can learn from Martha:
1-She took her complaint directly to Jesus, when she was upset that Mary wasnt helping out.
That tells us, if we have someone in our life causing trouble rather than expressing our grievance to anyone who will listen - TAKE IT TO JESUS. Matthew 7:7 says "ask and it will be given to you"
The greek form of the word ASK implies 'keep on asking'. He is never to busy to hear our hearts. We cant wear Him out.
2-Jesus really cares about what concerns us "cast your anxiety on Him because he cares for you" 1 Peter 5:7
3-Jesus loves us. Enough to confront us when our attitude is wrong. "those whom I love I rebuke and discipline." Revelations 3:19
Bad things happen to good people. Real problems occur. Jesus knew a life filled with fear. Without faith we cannot please God or draw close to Him for comfort.

Gratitude is important. it has the power to change our
Attitude.
When we are giving thanks to God in all things, not just some things. Something shifts. we begin to see life as Christ sees - full of opprotunity rather than obstacles.

Serving God:
Service for God is not unimportant. James 2:17 "faith by itself if it is not accompanied by action is dead" Serving God and others is really important. Hard work is often part of what we are called to do. he Bible says "whatever you hand finds to do, do it with all your might" Ecclesiastes 9:10.
While there are many things that need to be done, dont find yourself knee deep in another project or too exhausted from our latest goings on to do what God wants us to do. Service was never suppose to be our first priority or first order of business.

If you struggle to stay at His feet, ask the Lord to reveal what is hindering you. There is no reason to lay aside your intellect or personality, come as you are. A child of God. Galations 3:1,3 tells us that Paul sent a wake up letter to his beloved church in Galations and he called the Judaizers' gospel slavery and added "you foolish Galations who has bewitched you after beginning with the spirit are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort? "
If we arent careful, we can fall prey to the same kind of lies the Galations fell for, that tells us we must perform in order to earn Gods love. The Bible is clear God created us to fellowship, he longs to pour out his very life into us to give us inheritance.
Never confuse duty with devotion.

Warning signs of Martha overload:
-There should not be any limits to what I can do
-I have the capacity to help everyone
-I am the oly person available to help
-i must never make a mistake
-I have the availablity to change another person

Exodus 18:17-18 says: "what you are doing is not good.. you will only wear yourself out. The work is too heavy for you. You cannot handle it alone.

Fair or not fair, equal or unequal we weigh it all if we arent careful our view on the world can become distorted. Every little word can take hidden meaning. Each action seems like a personal attack. If you look for injustice. You usually can find it.
Satan enjoys using our hectic schedules, stressed bodies and emotional upsets in his efforts to put up barriers to our intimacy with God. Thats why we need to take a close look at any thought, feeling, or activity that diminishes our appetite for intimacy with God. Watch out for those '3 deadly D's' I mentioned earlier.


Want more?
Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World by Joanna Weaver - 12 week Bible study
available at Lifeway.